I’ve realized that I have a privilege set before me every day where I get to choose what I believe. I teach this to my kids all the time, especially as we start to pray, read a scripture, or receive a blessing spoken over us. They’ve heard it 1,000 times: “Do you guys know what it means to really believe? You have to believe to receive. Do you believe that what Jesus says to us is real and true?”
I would love to say that they jump up and down and rejoice in the amazing understanding and appreciation of God’s grace and mercy and shout, “Yes! We Believe!” What I get instead is rolling of the eyes and exasperated sighs: “Yes, mom. Yes, we believe. Yes, we know God is true. You ask us this every time.” “Yes,” I say, “but you have to believe it or its just words.” But is our God not big enough to take a mustard seed size amount of faith and a few jumbled words to answer a prayer?
“Lord save me!” Peter was literally drowning in doubts as he began to sink in the water, and Jesus didn’t stand there and make sure he had all his doubts erased before stretching out His hand to deliver him. I’ve wondered why I so strongly want to know my kids believe. Why is it that it’s so imperative that I hear them say “Yes, we believe”? It does give me a sense of security and comfort knowing they are saying the words, but doesn’t God already know their hearts? Isn’t He strong enough and big enough to lead and guide them in their own personal journey of faith, just as He has done for me? Is He not the “author and perfecter of our faith" (Hebrews 12:2)? Doesn’t God promise He will meet our every need? Aren’t my children God’s before they are mine? Doesn’t He care for them more than I could possibly attempt to try? I feel like I hear Jesus saying, “Becky, why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” (Mark 4:40)
How can I be so strongly convinced in my security in Christ, and be steadfast on His promises of salvation, yet still battle doubt so many times each day? Am I good enough? Am I parenting right? Am I pretty enough? Am I smart enough? Did I use enough coupons at Publix to save us $? Did I take enough time to look at all the sale items before buying new stuff? Am I doing enough for God? Am I calling my friends enough? Am I involved enough at church? Am I doing enough at work to meet my own expectations and those of my boss? Am I patient enough for my daughter? Do I play enough for my son? Am I encouraging enough for my husband???? When is enough enough Lord?! “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24)
Jesus is so good and sets me right immediately: “Quiet! Be Still! Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” (Mark 4:39, 6:50) “Becky,” the Lord says, “No one is good enough but Me”. That’s why I’m utterly dependent on God. That’s why my days are interrupted with the messes of life: reminders that I need God’s help. I need His intervention. I’m not expected to do all and be all.
Ahhhh, sweet release. Peace. “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have PEACE with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by FAITH into this GRACE in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the HOPE of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also REJOICE in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, HOPE. And HOPE does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” Romans 5:1-5
I’m choosing to claim what my kids say to me: “Yes, I do believe.” Enough said!
I’m choosing to claim what my kids say to me: “Yes, I do believe.” Enough said!
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